The Reason You Exist! TRYE…

TRYE, the reason you exist, big question, I haven’t time for this, I have a plane to catch, the speech is half prepared, and the babysitter is late, I know why i exist, will someone find me a nappy, Jesus, can babies shit, where are the wipes, damn it, those creams are so sticky, on my god, someone has dropped the nappy on my speech, please stop crying, the reason I exist, how the hell am i supposed to know this, I will deal with it later.

Pouring over the speech, worried about delivery, the pause, you have to get it right, like a catwalk model who know’s how to pose, timing, it’s important just to pause at the right moment. Tipexed out, you pass the splotched paper to your assistant, she will even wash your dirty underwear, and your smelly socks, she depends on you for her living, and the ball of cash, a dependent of sorts, you can’t exist without each other.

Eight in the evening, and you return home, exhausted, you fall onto the couch, the baby sitter smiles, baby ate and slept well, you sigh, i can deal with that, one of these days baby will be going to school, and you will smile, cause you were responsible for getting her that far, well, you and the babysitter, why do I exist you ask. You climb the stairs to the bedroom, you feel your chest tighten, panic hits you, is this the moment, when you won’t exist.

The hospital is bright, your helpless, wires stick you, and machines all around you, suddenly, all you can think of, why have I been doing all this. You realize your an egotistical smile, the money you made will never be spent, and the friends you have, are not friends ,just acquaintances, the only thing you have in common, wealth, and there is no feeling in that, unless your making plenty and getting high on the buzz. Why do I exist, the question runs through your head, the doubts that can’t be hidden by a busy routine.

You exist to overcome the material, in favor of Spirit, for how can it fly, if it’s burdened by what is temporary, amen, how can you pass it on!.

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Addiction

Can’t fill the gap inside, it’s impossible, can’t, I am going to throw up, she is on her feet and moving, not too bad he smiles, geeing up her Spirits. She is seriously wobbly, will collapse at the first obstacle, he holds her arm, he is leading her to the toilet. Spittle at the edge of the mouth, her hair once lush, has thinned out, he waits outside the door, making gestures to himself, this too will pass. Alcohol addiction, what a curse. He listens while she washes up, readies the energy, she will require his time for a few days, in order to get over the worst of it. The nerves will settle, it’s just the encouragement she needs at the start.

The bathroom door opens, there is a smile on her face, the same smile you would imagine on a small baby, after taking it’s first steps, i did it I did it, you sure did he sighed, how easy was that, a little effort, a smile on a face. She makes it back to the bedroom, her glass of water is half full, she will want a refill. A loud sigh, she is between the covers, food he asks, she shakes her head, I will get you a glass of water instead. He leaves the room, ventures to the kitchen, takes a deep breath, slogans come to mind, he makes an effort to ignore them, refills the glass, heads back up the stairs. She is sleeping, day one over he sighs, while leaving the glass on the bedside locker.

With a little help from you friends sighed Solomon, and it’s easy to overcome, an addiction.

A Total Recall

 

Ever the feeling, the one thought that is constant, it floats from mind to mind, the moment when the stranger will appear, invisible but very real. How our Spirits are interfered with, the power of thought and well being curbed, as if someone had applied a break. It must be on so many minds, apart from those addicted, well addicted is too hard a word, it assumes medical need, the suppression of an old habit, it means there is something wrong, what are we going to do about it, almost. No, no, the scale of the problem, so damn political, the scale of the issue, sounds a lot better, particularly to the addict, a business proposal more the truth, you will pay for the therapy, you can pay me back later, the connotations, you can read so many ways. But the stranger in the room, the heckler in the audience, the noise that wants to make noise, the head miner, feeling for anxiety, hoping to exploit, Solomon was listening to it all, and most importantly, the stranger in the room, total recall.

We lived in a world where news was used to exploit undermine and unhinge at times, those receiving it, some call it head mining, others call it propaganda, Solomon sighed, it wasn’t exactly new or anything, it just happened that, that same power to harry people, was now in nearly every pair of hands in the world, total recall, smell the coffee.

The Young Master

He went to reach for his toothbrush, felt a brush against his leg, two sleepy eyes look up at him, Solomon smiled, inside he thought to himself, I hoped you would stay in bed, even an hour would have been great, that plan is gone, he continues to wash his teeth instead. Little hand reaches for his, Solomon smears it with paste, watches while the child imitates his moves, his small eyes watching how he moved the brush across his mouth, half laughing, but seriously laughing, glad to have a role model, one he

could argue with, one he could ask, one he was not afraid of. Stern words were never spoken, just a cast of the eyes and a frown did the trick every time. The routine is finished, the time for the breakfast, Solomon does the big friend thing, sits down and eats with the small boy. Slurp after slurp, the watchfulness of the young master, imitating the teacher, a wise young child.

How Children imitate it all; and how those charged with responsibilities tried to blame the individual for their failures. Later; He hears the cot move, the time is early morning, Solomon sighed; so this is what it’s like to be a mother, your children take your attention and time. The stuff Solomon learned from the young master, amen.

Beat the Devil

Poor, lacking an education, passed over, your home address off putting, what a start, there has to be something better, your weighing up the chances of success, while others are weighing up your chances of failure. It will reach a point when you fall over, and where will you be then, where will your God be then. The fear seeps in, the constant worry. temptation rises, you take unnecessary chances, you have less and less empathy for others, till finally you use any opportunity, regardless, where is your God when you need Him, the taunt of the demon.

It was said all those years ago; you will be mocked, made a fool of, ridiculed, spoken badly of, after a kind or thoughtful act, your troubles will mount, you will become despairing, what then, where is your God.

A child looks in the window, knows he will never afford to buy what is for sale, the only way of getting one, is stealing them. Eventually, gets caught, is thrown into a detention center, where there are worse, who will teach him even worse things, and invite him into their world as soon as he is free again. It is a carousel, the new arrivals, the few who are deemed ready, the life after, when they join the Gang, all over a simple pair of shoes in a window. He is transferred for £100 million, cheap says the oldest of the boys, cheap at a 100, he could have gone for 140 instead.

Noah, Abraham, Moses, Jeremiah, Isaiah, Esther, and many others braved temptation, and we still recall them today, and many others. They all beat the devil, amen.

Jesus promoted forgiveness for reasons of supreme wisdom; think about it, how forgiveness leaves you light as a feather, no more grief to hang on to, that is how you do it, amen.

One Day

She lies on the bed, the tired body and the heavy head, sore from a bruising. You will meet worse than me he said, years before, when he spoke to a so called friend of the thug who helped end her life. Really sighed Solomon, could anyone be worse than what he was looking at, someone who preyed on the vulnerable, dosed them with drugs, to keep them under his control. Not likely sighed Solomon to himself.

After many promises and interventions, and the missing friends: they too had a life to get on with, she finally is overcome, a victim; the blame put on the descent into alcoholism. She knocked on many doors, sought help from many corners, all she attracted were the wolves who preyed on them, those without back up or good friends. One day he sighed.

Solomon was recalling a friend, who had passed on this day years before, a true tragedy.

Imagine It

If you could turn every one with evil intent into a babbling fool, just imagine it, their mouths pouring our dribble, imagine it. Solomon was recalling the story of old, the power of Great Spirit, the power the Child Jesus was gifted with. Casting out demons was on Solomon’s mind, the grudges, hatred, resentments that so many carried and found an opening at the wrong time. At least with alcohol you had to consume it first before you went on the rampage. With the silent resentments and hatreds stored within, (good reason or not, experience or what), once the topic was raised, accordingly, the partnering feelings rise with it, those deep seated feelings and anxieties, boom, the explosion, touchy feely they say, they being friends, they being polite. Imagine it, God Most High, who has heard it all, waiting for mankind to mature, the way a farmer waits, for the plant to give it’s full potential, imagine it, waiting for the day, when they would all realize that today was the day everyday, not the baggage you brought with you everywhere, smile, amen.